Another Giant Hole : Utah Lotsa Parks, part 3


Day 4 : Scenic road of DOOM and Canyonlands, Island in the Sky

This was the plan: take the scenic drive to Canyonlands and the highway back to Moab. That way we’d see more of the landscape than if we took the same road in and out. Much later, when we were ashen and still shaking and talking to a couple about how they looked up on YouTube a particular road they were thinking of driving, I had the clichéd palm-meet-face moment. Before that day, to me “scenic drive” has meant any or all of the following
  • paved or level dirt/gravel
  • curvy
  • slight hills
  • nice vistas
To people who didn’t grow up in Flatlander, USA, scenic drives consist of
  • deep sand/gravel/dirt/half-buried boulders/washouts
  • hairpin turns
  • insane grades
  • “Can’t look at the vistas, too busy focusing only on a spot 5 feet in front of the bumper to impede vertigo.”
Here’s how it all played out.

The beginning of our scenic drive was wonderful. The Potash-Lower Colorado River Scenic Byway U-279 is breathtaking, with huge red rock cliffs kissing the side of a winding road that hugs the Colorado River.

 

The car parked just ahead of us were a bunch of climbers. Nutters.
Seriously, how do you climb that?!
A couple miles after this is where it all went to hell. When we turned off U-279 onto Long Canyon Road, and in the mesa valley it seemed okay– mostly flat, a few rocks and bumps, great scenery. I think we just started to convince ourselves that this was a good idea when we reached the first climbing switchback, but by then there really was no way we were turning the car around on that road. As we climbed higher and higher the worst-case-scenario dioramas I had been constructing in my head were involving more and more blood and explosions.
As the car, thankfully, kept moving forward and our use of four-letter words got Shakesperian, we came to the fallen rock “tunnel.” I don’t have a photo myself because I was too busy hyperventilating, but if you follow this link you’ll see some of what I’m talking about. You’ll also see that they rate the road as “Easy.” Okay. Sure. Fine.
Before we took off on our harrowing journey Dan had mounted the GoPro on the roof rack and once were were safely back in our hotel that night we reviewed it. The camera is outside the car in a watertight protective case and you can still hear us inside the car screaming in relief once we reached the top of the mesa. I’ll share when he’s finished editing.
The next stop on our journey was Dead Horse Point State Park at the top of the mesa. We heard the views from this park were incredible, not to mention it’s also where they shot the final scene from “Thelma & Louise.” So it was a must-see, natch.

 

 

 

 

 

A short way down the road is the entrance to Canyonlands National Park, Island in the Sky region. Our 3rd National Park in as many days!

 

What you see here is Shafer Road, which I hear is a much less exciting way to get to/from CNP than Pucker Pass. Utah.
He believes he can fly. He believes he can touch the sky.
Grand View Point Overlook

 

 

 

Upheaval Dome. Is it a salt dome that bubbled up thru the rock or an impact crater? A Canyonlands mystery.
Green River Overlook

The hike to Mesa Arch is short but at the end of it is one of the Park’s most iconic formations. Two things I didn’t know: you can walk on it (notice the legs in the first pic) and it spans the edge of a mesa. So that means you’re walking on a relatively thin ribbon of rock over a 2000 foot drop. Nope.

 

Nope.
Dan’s almost being that guy.

 

 

We left Canyonlands and headed back to Moab (100% on paved roads) for our final night on the town. We ended up at Woody’s Tavern, which Dan called “the Carol’s Pub of Moab,” after our waitress at Moab Diner told us not to go to another place called Cabo (?) because fights always break out there. The place was a gem, with great graffiti on the bar and an amazing live blues band. If we didn’t have an early wake up call I’m sure we would’ve started treating it like Carol’s and stayed until 4am.
Elephant butt.
Pot leaf and a penis. Score!
I’m also a big fan of good bathroom scrawlings.
Side note. The other day Dan told me he’d do the Pucker Pass again and he’d like to be the one behind the wheel. I say get me drunk first and I’ll think about it.

Leave a comment